Asking a man to perform a paternity test?
There is no perfect way for a mother to ask a man to perform a paternity. Essentially, how you pose the question to the alleged father will be determined based on the relationship between the alleged father and the mother of the child.
Below are some common scenarios people are faced with when paternity is uncertain.
Scenario 1: Disagreeable unmarried parents no cheating was involved but there is no trust.
If the couple is not married, it is important to emphasize that paternity testing is the only way to establish a legal relationship between the father and the child. It is recommended to explain the implications of paternity testing to the potential father and how it will ensure the well-being and security of the child in the future.
It is important to remain as forthright as possible and approach the topic with understanding. Especially, if having a child was discussed and both parties agreed they did not want children.
Conversations about the paternity of a child when there is very little to no trust in a relationship may provoke a variety of emotions (good or bad). But the important thing to keep in mind is the best interest of the child. This is why a paternity test not only establishes the paternity for the child but it may allow the parents to build more trust with one another in this particular circumstance.
Scenario 2: Cheating married wife wants to remove her husband’s name from the birth certificate.
In this situation, The mother may feel overwhelmed, scared, and uncertain about this decision, while the husband may feel shocked and betrayed. It is important for the wife to explain to her husband that paternity testing is the only way to legally remove his name from the birth certificate.
Although this exact situation is not abundant. It should be noted that the husband has the right not to perform a paternity test. The mother of the child oftentimes has already performed a DNA test the biological father which is why the wife (depending circumstance) may ask her husband to perform a DNA test. If the husband agrees the couple will go through a divorce proceedings in order to have true biological father’s name added to the birth certificate.
In this situation, it is important to explain the importance of paternity testing for the well-being and security of the child. It is also important to emphasize that paternity testing is the only way to legally establish a parent-child relationship and to ensure that the child’s rights are protected. Additionally, it is important to provide the potential fathers with resources and information to help them make an informed decision.
Scenario 3: Promiscuous female who uncertain who the father is of child is asking more than one man to perform a paternity.
In a situation, where a female has had intercourse at the same time with more than one man and all parties are aware they are engaged in an open sexual relationships with other people. The best approach for a female to consider is to approach the man she believes may be the biological father first and explain to him that you are either having a child or if the mother has given birth already. She will need to explain the importance of establishing the paternity of her child to alleged father.
The approach should be honest and straight forward. These types of conversations are never easy and are emotionally charged. The focus should be on paternity establishment. If the alleged father agrees to perform the DNA test and the results shows he is the biological father. Then asking the other man to perform a DNA test is not necessary.
If the first man is not the biological father of the child then the mother will have to repeat the process and possibly have a second difficult conversation with the second man. It is recommended that if you are looking to establish the paternity of child we recommend that you speak with a Family Law Attorney regarding your specific circumstance.
How to ask a mother for a paternity test?
The best way to ask a woman to perform a DNA test will depend upon the communication between the unmarried parents. If the communication is good stating your uncertainty about a child being biologically yours to the mother will foster feelings of untrustworthiness, hurt and anger in most cases, But if there is a decent communication the mother may be willing to allow her child to perform a DNA paternity test.
In the event, the mother refuses to perform a paternity test, An alleged father’s only recourse is to file a paternity petition with family court. If the petition is accepted the Judge will issue court order to the mother where the Judge will request a DNA paternity test be performed. When a biological relationship is confirmed and paternity is established the child will receive child support.
It should be need noted that married men (husbands) can perform a paternity test if they have legal custody of their child with or without the mother. It always recommended to have the mother involved in the paternity test if she is available.